Temptation
by slightlysickpsycho
Summary: Bella is dating Edward, but her heart belongs to Alice. Pretty standard slash, but it does Bellice justice, and good Twilight femslash is shockingly rare. Rated for what's coming in later chapters.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own anything but the plot of this story!

Please review! This is my first Twilight fic so I'm dying for feedback :)

* * *

Alice didn't walk, she danced.

Ballerina in the cafeteria, sprinkling fairy dust over every mundane moment she brushed past.

Charlie could never bear knowing his only child had turned out… _like that. _That the family would end with me, and he would never see a grandchild born of his own blood.

Edward carried some of her beauty and grace, though beside her his glow was like that of a candle facing the blistering sun. As hard as I tried, I couldn't even see him when she was near.

Their beauty, their grace, even their feral nature, drew me like nothing human ever could. Even if I couldn't have Alice in the light, keeping Edward beside me was enough to fuel the desperate dreams that occupied the darkness of each night.

Yes, she could break even the most flawless dancer's heart. She moved like a soft cool wind, raising goosebumps on my neck every time. I tried not to stare.

Even with my disgustingly common brown hair, with my plain brown eyes and translucent skin that could only ever be burned by the sun's warm glow, I knew she found me beautiful.

Sure, Edward did too. His whole family (Rosalie aside) seemed to have taken an unusual liking to me. Of course it only mattered because it might bring Alice closer to my grasp.

I was so glad he couldn't read my mind, even if he did see the occasional flicker of desire in hers. Alice was a sensual being, even more so than the rest of the vampires that had become her family. For her to feel the stirrings of desire meant very little to Edward, especially since Jasper was so adept at providing distraction from potentially hazardous moments.

Honestly, I'm not sure why Jasper didn't kill me himself. He had to feel the desire radiating from my very core every time I so much as stole a glance at his incredible little pixie, but he had never said a word, never been anything but polite to me, even if he felt the need to put some distance between us. To this day I have no idea whether it was my enticing aroma that caused him to pull away, or the knowledge of what I felt for his eternal partner.

Jasper and Alice must have had some sort of understanding between them. He never did try to stand between us, even if I could sometimes sense him nearby, feeding off the raw lust that made its presence known once Alice and I had been given the chance to get to know each other.

Maybe he got off on that, feasted on the emotions his one love could stir in another, drank in the waves of bliss that flowed out into the universe as each orgasm created them.

I don't really care. All I feel is gratitude for his lack of possessive drive. He knew she wanted me months before I did, ever since that first day in the cafeteria, when my eyes met hers before I noticed Edward.

Oh, poor Edward. I guess I can never tell him that most of his family has found ways around his little "gift". Once his venom fills my veins, I will become his eternal possession. After that day, I doubt I'll still be able to love Alice the way I do now, even if it feels so natural, so right, it could be nothing short of destiny.

She grins at me across the room. Third hour French, we are together. She manages to make her conjugations sound clumsy, despite the decades she's spent living in the heart of Paris. Halfway through, her eyes glaze over. A mild form of epilepsy, Carlisle has the teachers convinced. I wonder what she sees. Edward is hunting this weekend. Could it finally be time?

After class she corners me.

"Bella, you need new clothes."

I pout. "What's wrong with what I'm wearing?"

"First, I love you, but you dress like a straight boy, Second, I think if you don't get out of the house soon, those hermetic tendencies may become permanent."

I roll my eyes, but the battle's already lost. I'm putty in her perfect hands.

"Great. Meet me in the parking lot when your last class gets out."

I shake my head, but she knows I'll be there, waiting. Flashing a brilliant smile, she skips away.

"What was that about?" Edward's eyes don't sparkle quite like hers. I shrug.

"Alice on a makeover kick. I'll survive."

He flashes that all-too-familiar lopsided smile, pulling me off to the side.

His kisses are suffocating. I try to imagine a smaller, more agile granite tongue dancing across mine.

Edward's tongue can't do ballet. More like a drunk attempt at river dancing, really. I sigh and push him away.

"Not here." I mutter, fully aware that there isn't a single place on the planet where kissing him would feel just right. He looks frustrated, but walks me to class without complaint.

I'm counting down the minutes 'til the end of the day. As much as I hate shopping, I can't help but look forward to being with Alice.

I don't even have to walk to the parking lot. She's waiting outside the building where I have my last class of the day, sharp teeth glinting in the dull light filtering down from the clouded sky. I hop in the car, trying not to stare. I may be used to the perfection of the rest of her family, but her smile always makes me come undone. I barely remember to feel afraid as she weaves through traffic at terrifying speeds, talking to me casually and barely bothering to glance at the road blurring past us.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight!

* * *

Winter is coming already. Autumns leaves have fallen and crumbled away, leaving the dark branches naked as they reach into the stark white sky. Right now it's hard to believe that the air outside the car is bitingly cold. Alice has music playing; she always listens to music when she drives. We listen to the radio sometimes, but she prefers her homemade CDs, strange mixes whose songs span every genre and decade yet still fit together perfectly. Edward rarely plays music in his car. He's always full of questions, interested in rehashing the infinitely dull details of my everyday existence.

One thing I love about going places with Alice is that she doesn't ask too many questions. She doesn't need to; as much as it sometimes annoys me, I've started to suspect that her premonitions aren't the only manifestation of her unusually strong intuition. I would think she could read my mind if I weren't so convinced she simply knows exactly how I think. She sings softly, but the power in her delicate voice still resonates in the pit of my stomach, filling me with a strange lightness. Gazing out the window, I finally realize that the scenery blurring past is unfamiliar.

"Alice, where are we going?" I try not to sound nervous.

"I told you silly, we're going shopping."

"We've been driving an hour and we're nowhere near Port Angeles."

"Did I ever say we were going there?"

"That's what I told Charlie when I called him. He'll be worried if I'm back late."

Her eyes sparkle as she shoots me an impish grin. "I've already talked to Charlie. You were going to sleep over tonight anyway, remember?"

I nod, trying not to bite down too hard on my lower lip. Charlie is putty in Alice's pretty little hands. Sometimes I wonder if there's anything she couldn't talk him into. As much as he loves her, I doubt that he could accept what I feel for her.

Edward, of course, is off on another one of his silly little hunting trips. There are plenty of animals in the area that could easily quench his thirst, but he says it's more exciting when his prey puts up a fight. At first I hated him for making Alice stay with me during his absences, convinced she would resent having to spend so much time babysitting the fragile, clumsy human. After the first few nights, I felt a lot more at ease around her. I've never been that close to other girls, but it's hard to put up isolating walls to block out someone so playful and irresistibly charming. Sometimes I wonder if she needed a female friend as much as I did. She's crazy about Rosalie, but they have little in common aside from their love of preening together.

Alice is singing again. Her voice is so beautiful I can't bear to interrupt it with my own. After a few minutes, she gives me a searching look.

"Are you alright, Bella?" She brushes aside the curtain of hair that hides my face as I stare awkwardly at the dashboard.

"Yeah. Are you going to tell me where we're going?"

"We're almost there. It's just a small city that has some great stores."

I nod. Moments later, we pull off the highway. There isn't much around us, but the houses we pass are massive, breathtakingly beautiful but a little intimidating.

"Alice?"

"Yes, Bella?"

"What exactly are we shopping for?"

"Just clothes. Don't pretend you have everything you need for winter. I can't bear to see someone as pretty as you are stomping around dressed like a lumberjack."

"I don't dress like a lumberjack!"

She glances pointedly at my shirt, one of Charlie's old flannels thrown on over a tank top- coming from Phoenix, I don't exactly have too many options when it comes to long sleeved shirts.

"Are you hungry? I know I'm supposed to feed you every couple of hours. You have to remind me if that sort of thing slips my mind."

I shake my head. I can't imagine eating right now.

"Fine," she says, "but we're going to stop and get you dinner after the first few stores whether you want it or not." I steal a glance at the determined way she holds her lips. She's so adorable when she's feeling stubborn…

She pulls down a long street lined with pretty little buildings. I glance through store windows with tall, intimidating mannequins dressed in outfits much more daring than any I could ever hope to pull off.

"We'll start with shirts. That shouldn't be too much for you to handle." Alice glances over to see if I'm going to object before pulling into a parking spot. Before I've even managed to unbuckle, she's pulling the door open and offering me her hand. I take it and stand up, blushing as she pulls me into a building with a sleek and flawless exterior.

The inside of the store is large. An abundance of empty space lends an air of importance to the garments that are on display. I brush my fingers over a tantalizingly soft sweater, discreetly trying to find a price tag. She swats my hand away, clearly aware of my intentions.

"I'm dressing you for the sake of my own sanity, Bella. You can't seriously think I'm going to make you pay for anything."

I open my mouth to argue, but she waves her hand at me dismissively. "Come on, there's someone I want you to meet." Her smooth cool fingers wrap around my wrist as she tugs me toward the back of the store.

A tall, slender woman with long auburn hair stands with her back to us, carefully arranging a clothing display.

"Christy!" Alice squeals delightedly. The girl jumps and spins to face us, clearly startled by our quiet approach.

"Alice, where have you been?" She runs at Alice full force, letting out a little puff of air as she collides with the hard body.

"School, keeping an eye on Edward's new girlfriend."

Christy turns to look at me, and I can't help but feel intimidated. Her sparkling, unnervingly bright blue-green eyes are fixed on me, filled with undisguised fascination.

"So this must be the 'Bella' I've heard so much about." She is narrow and willowy, with delicate features and high cheekbones. Tiny constellations of freckles peek out anywhere her skin is revealed. I wonder if she really has freckles _everywhere_, and can't help but blush.

Alice squeezes me. "Isn't it adorable when she does that?"

Christy grins and nods before speaking. "She's perfectly lovely, but why is she dressed like that?"

"Like what?" I can't fight back the frustration that makes my voice sound defensive.

Christy looks slightly uncomfortable. "I just meant that with Alice always on your back, I'm surprised to see you wearing something so… sensible." I feel a bit insulted, but her enthusiasm is contagious. Soon I'm being dragged from rack to rack as both girls chatter excitedly, flinging garments into my arms. After a while, Christy pauses.

"I think it's time to try some stuff on before the pile gets too high for poor Bella to see where she's going." Christy chuckles. They each take an armful of shirts and lead me to the changing room.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight!

* * *

The changing rooms I'm used to are normally a series of small stalls. I'm somewhat taken aback by the opulence of this one. It is a single large room with mirrors everywhere and a large plush sofa in the center. I feel a rush of apprehension as I realize Christy isn't going to leave.

The two girls fall into a comfortable rhythm. Alice pulls my shirt off in a quick, sweeping motion- almost like a magician jerking a tablecloth aside, leaving the delicate china settings undisturbed. Christy is already holding a shirt, and pulls it over my head with little delay. Both girls then circle me, examining the shirt from every angle.

"I like this one." Alice comments.

"The white looks good with her skin," Christy agrees, "but you'll have to take her down the street to get some proper undergarments."

My cheeks flash crimson. "What's wrong with my bra?"

Alice giggles. "Oh, Bella, she's simply stating the obvious: that it doesn't do you justice. You have a cute little body. It's a shame to hide it under drab, baggy clothes. And those boobs…"

I jump and let out a tiny squeak as her arms shoot out from behind my back, groping playfully at my chest. "Not supporting them properly is a tragic waste." She shoots me an impish grin. Strange feelings crash through my body as I try to act nonchalant. Christy nods, solemnly agreeing with Alice's assessment.

I'm dazed. I can't believe Alice just casually grabbed my breasts. I know it's something a lot of girls do without a second thought when they're hanging out with close friends, but…

I'm trying not to get too distracted by the tingling heat blossoming between my legs.

"You okay, Bella? You look a little flushed." Alice grins, giving me the eerie sense that she knows something I don't.

"Yeah, fine. Just… um, a little hungry." I am not hungry. I instantly regret this lie as Alice's amber eyes light up and she launches into a long description of our dining options.

When she has reached the end of her tirade, I shrug. "I guess Chinese sounds good." I admit.

"Great. I'll get some food in you as soon as we're done here."

By the time we leave, Alice is carrying a few absurdly overstuffed bags of shirts she has chosen for me. Most of them are a little more daring than I could imagine wearing, but I don't want to hurt her feelings.

Of course she insisted I wear one of them out. Me wearing Charlie's flannel was more than she could bear. Instead, I am now wearing a deep red shirt with flowing sleeves and a sharp, plunging neckline. I feel a little exposed, and can't help but sit with my hands covering my breasts.

"Oh, loosen up." Alice teases, "The bra situation is next on our list."

I'm horrified. And thrilled… though not by the concept of new bras. The car creeps along a few more blocks before stopping at what is obviously a lingerie store.

"Not gonna happen, Alice." But she knows her pout is too cute to ignore.

I let her lead me through an opaque door into a room with bright pink walls and things on display that I could never imagine myself wearing. Lace camisoles and little corsets are the sort of thing that flatter someone like Alice, not someone like me… I gaze at the garments surrounding us, unable to resist wondering what they would look like on _her_.

I had no idea how much my mind had been wandering until the middle aged woman talking to Alice started taking my bra measurements. I can feel the blush burning in my cheeks as I desperately try to remember what we were just talking about.

"You make yourself look tiny when you wear a bra that small! That can't even be comfortable." My blush deepens at Alice's reprimands.

"I didn't think that sort of thing really mattered that much…" I trail off, worried by the excited look on her face.

"We need to buy you heels!" She exclaims. "You have incredible legs but all you ever do is hide them…"

"Do you have any idea who you're talking to?" I ask, incredulous.

Alice's laughter is the most beautiful sound I've ever heard. I try not to let it distract me.

"You don't understand. I'll kill myself trying to walk in those. I can barely manage not to trip barefoot!"

"After dinner," she says, "we can get you some pants and shoes."

"I already have shoes!"

"You only have four pairs, Bella!"

"Dress shoes, sandals, boots, and sneakers. What else do I need?"

She looks like her head might explode. I try not to smile, but I love her when she's angry.

While we're talking, her fingers dance expertly through the different racks. I pray that some of the things she's picking up are for her to try on, and not intended for me.

The dressing room here is smaller. She follows me behind the large curtain blocking it off, stands so close my shoulders brush against her as I pull my shirt over my head. I shiver as her cool, agile fingers unclasp my bra, surprised by the intimacy of the contact.

"Sorry," she mutters, "I forgot I have cold hands."

I turn around and smile, taking one of her hands and pressing it against my cheek. "I like your hands." She smiles back, sliding her hand away and letting her arm drop, then offering me a bra to try. Taking the hint, I quickly pull off my bra and put on the new one. Again, she helps me with the clasp. I can't deny the rush of excitement burning inside me at her every touch.

"Is it alright with you if we just get a hotel and spend the night?"

"What?" I ask, startled.

"It's a long drive back and Charlie doesn't like the thought of us being out and about too late, so he asked if we would just spend the night in town if we end up shopping more than we thought we would." She is the picture of innocence, smiling sweetly.

"Oh," I say, dazed, "if you don't mind. I guess Charlie would feel better about it."

Her grin floods my stomach with butterflies.


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight!

* * *

Trying on bras with Alice is insane. Every time she touches me, it sets me on fire. I have to fight hard not to turn around and slam her against the dressing room wall, exploring every inch of her body with every inch of mine.

Finally, we leave. I am now wearing a new bra under my new shirt and painfully aware of the way strangers' eyes keep sweeping over my body. I'm also seething with rage over the new panties Alice has insisted I need. The lacy boyshorts are almost tolerable, but I blush crimson just thinking of the thongs. She steers me into a restaurant with smooth red and black décor.

We order, even though I know she won't eat hers. I chew each bite excessively, and still struggle to swallow. She looks more amused than concerned, and I remember the premonition she seemed to have earlier. I wonder what she saw. After an agonizingly slow half-hour of moving food around with my chopsticks, I sigh heavily and push away my plate, declaring that I'm stuffed. She looks dubious but grins and tells me we can always order room service later. I can't help but wonder what the night will bring.

By the time we leave the last store and head for the hotel, there are more clothes in the car than I have in my bedroom at home. I'm shocked by the size of the pristine white building, and more than a little unnerved when Alice pulls up to the front and mentions that valet parking is the only option. We aren't allowed to carry any of our bags, and for some reason all of my clothes are taken up to the room. The little overnight bag Alice has packed for herself doesn't escape my notice. Just when _did_ she decide we were spending the night?

When we get to the front desk, I hardly hear the conversation that transpires because I'm so absorbed in the beauty of the large lobby. I almost jump out of my skin when Alice leans over and whispers, cool breath fanning across my neck.

"Think you could stand sharing a bed with a vampire?"

I gape at her, stunned. The man standing behind the desk continues to apologize profusely while explaining that people usually make reservations and no rooms with multiple beds are available. I nod numbly, wondering why the number of beds would even matter since Alice never sleeps.

I doubt that I'll be getting much sleep myself.

I can't bear to imagine what the room we end up in might cost. When the man escorting us in his crisp black uniform opens the door, a small groan escapes my lips. This is obviously the honeymoon suite. The bed is huge, surrounded by silky hangings in deep, rich colors. There is a lot of red. I roll my eyes.

"Short notice, remember?" Alice whispers playfully, but I wonder if she just likes this room because it's so girly. "Tonight, Bella," she teases, "you may be my bride!"

I giggle at her overdone gesture and absurd inflection, wishing I didn't blush so easily. The man's eyes widen marginally as she slips a tip in his hand, and he leaves quickly. I notice that our stuff is already in the room.

"Well," Alice says, "I think to have a proper pajama party, we need to change."

Again, I groan. Even worse, I blush. I squeal indignantly as she deftly yanks off my shirt, much like she did in the dressing room. My bra unclasps and I hold my arms to my chest nervously, hoping she doesn't notice how fast my heart's pounding.

"What's wrong, Bella?" she asks, pouting adorably. "Is it too cold in here?" She asks, at the exact moment I release my bra. I'm mortified when I realize just how perky my nipples are. She wraps her arms around me, and her cool breath fans over my face. "Bella," she murmurs, "can't I do something to warm you up?"

Now my cheeks are crimson. "I think I'll take a shower!" I blurt out, jerking my pants down as I wander toward the bathroom.

"Wouldn't you rather have a bath?" She asks, sounding so innocent. I jump as her breath grazes my neck. She is right behind me, has silently followed my every step. I gaze longingly at the large, opulent tub. Yes, I would love to take a bath, but I'm afraid she'll climb in with me, not because I don't want her to, but because I want to watch the water flowing against her body far more than I'd care to admit.

She has already turned on the tap, and added bubble bath. She peels away her clothes, slowly, with a grace that is uniquely Alice, and unquestionably enough to break any dancer's heart. But my heart isn't breaking because I'm clumsy. I want to love Edward, but I can't. I know what I feel for her is wrong, but that doesn't make me feel it any less. I step out of my pants and slip into the warm water, savoring the feeling as it glides against my skin, deeply inhaling the scent of the bubbles.

Alice is watching me. Her topaz eyes startle me at first, and I smile but look away. I can feel her gaze lingering on me. What did she see earlier, I wonder?

We talk about school, about our families, everything and nothing, but never mention Jasper or Edward. I feel immensely guilty; I know it isn't normal to be naked in the Jacuzzi tub of a honeymoon suite in some strange hotel with my best friend, yet I can't put my finger on just where we crossed a line. Certainly it was normal to go shopping together… Probably only logical to spend the night here, and there weren't any other rooms available on such short notice. It's not like Alice sleeps, so why would it be wrong for us to share a bed?

And I've seen other girls naked before. The female body is no mystery to me. I think the problem, really, is the way my eyes are always pulled to _Alice's_ body, the desperate desire to touch her.

She grins at me, shoulder deep in bubbles, and still I can't fight my fascination with her breathtaking face, with the flawless curve of her glistening granite neck…


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight!

* * *

After we dry off, she forces me to parade around in several of the embarrassingly revealing nightgowns she bought me. I roll my eyes.

"Tell me again why you had to buy me pajamas, Alice."

"Silly Bella," Her laugh is like bells ringing through my body. "how could we have a pajama party without them?"

"If we hadn't spent so long shopping, we wouldn't have had to spend the night." I point out.

She pouts. "Can't I do my brother a favor by making his girlfriend sleep in something a little nicer than old flannel?"

I blush, partially because of her pout, and partially because I feel a strange swell of guilt at the mention of Edward. For tonight, I almost want to pretend he isn't real.

She talks me into wearing a tiny black silk thing that only goes a few inches down my thigh with matching lace boy shorts. If she wants me to wear a thong, it's going to take more convincing that even she can manage in a single day.

"So what do you want to do?" she asks, with a grin that makes my heart flutter. She's wearing nothing but lace, and I can almost see her naked body beneath the clinging fabric.

"I don't know." I mutter.

"Want me to paint your toenails?"

"You brought nail polish?!"

"Bella," she says, adopting the haughtiest air she can pull off, "one must always be prepared, you know."

"Right." I roll my eyes. Maybe her intentions are innocent after all. I curse my sick, perverted mind for making my hopes soar the way they have.

We sit on the bed, since the odds of Alice spilling anything are practically nil. I'm surprised by the warmth of her smooth hand as it cradles my foot, but realize that she must have absorbed a lot of hear during our unusually long bath.

I feel a little weird about having my feet touched in general, but the contact is feather light and Alice seems fascinated by the shape my leg takes as she holds it. Again, I dare to hope her mind is as twisted as my own. She finishes surprisingly quickly, and starts to blow on my toes. I shiver.

"Alice," I whine, "this nightgown doesn't keep me warm at all."

The way she smiles, a strange, almost otherworldly pixie-like leer, floods my body with unwanted arousal. She crawls up the bed and pulls me under the covers, and her body is still warm like the bath.

"Edward never warmed me up like this." I murmur.

"Oh, Bella, Edward's missing out." She's curled up around me and every touch drives me insane. "You smell so good."

I almost moan, inhaling her sweet breath, thinking it's not possible for anything to ever smell as good as Alice. I think of how acute her senses are, and am almost positive she can smell just how much she turns me on. I can only muster three words. "So do you."

"'There's something I've been wondering…" she begins, and I know this conversation is headed somewhere specific, though I'm not sure where yet.

"What do you wonder?"

"Edward will never talk much about what the two of you do together. I know he kisses you. He won't tell me how your mouth tastes but I can see it in his eyes that you drive him wild. What strikes me as odd is that I don't think he's done much more to you."

"He's afraid he'll hurt me."

"You've read up on vampires. I saw that before it happened, though I didn't think Edward needed to know at the time. You know there are myths about different kinds."

"What are you getting at, Alice?"

"You also know that a lot of these myths have origins in truth. I know you've heard of a succubus."

"What does that have to do with Edward."

"Nothing, I suppose." she muses.

I'm starting to get frustrated, not just by the conversation, but by the way her body feels against mine, like smooth stone warmed in the sun. I want to run my fingers over her, I want to know if kissing her feels the way it does every time I can't help but imagine it.

"Alice, where is this conversation going?"

"Well, it has nothing to do with Edward," she says, "but it could."

"Huh?"

"Bella, you know about the Denalis."

"They're 'vegetarian' too?"

"Yes, but they are because they appreciate humans. Not drinking human blood doesn't mean never tasting human flesh. Our energies and desires can be harnessed and put to more… productive uses than simply killing."

"Why hasn't Edward told me any of this?"

"Because," she giggles, "your dear boyfriend is a prude."

I roll my eyes. "I already knew that."

"He's probably afraid if he lets himself get too worked up around you, you'll think he's a huge pervert and ditch him."

Honestly, I'm a little pissed off right now. Is that the only reason he's kept me at arm's length, denying my fervent desires until they slowly died away?

"So he _could_ do more with me, but he just doesn't _want_ to?"

"Oh, I'm sure he wants to, but I think he's afraid. He might be worried about hurting you, but we can be just as gentle as we can be strong. If I tell you what I think it really is, do you promise you'll keep your mouth shut about it?"

"Of course, Alice. You know you can tell me anything."

"Edward has a lot of funny notions. I think he wants to keep you pure until he marries you."

"_Marries_ me?" I can't help but sound aghast. "I'm _seventeen!_ What if I want to wait until I'm older for something like that? Is he going to just keep treating me like a leper?"

She giggles. "He's missing out, I'm not going to deny that, but you don't have to."

Now she has my attention. My stomach is full of rushing butterflies. "What do you mean?" I ask, my voice a little dry.

"Before we go back tomorrow," she says, "we'll buy you a nice vibrator."

"_What?_" I'm embarrassed and disappointed. This wasn't where I thought the conversation was leading at all. I want Alice, not a battery operated penis.

"Don't be absurd, Bella. It'll be a gift. I'll get one for you, and never ask about it again. All I ask is that you try it _once_. I promise not to go peeking at your future to catch you if you decide you don't like it and throw it away."

"Fine." I'm in over my head. I can't say no to Alice.


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight!

* * *

"Bella, are you alright?" Alice asks after a long silence.

"I'm a little frustrated with Edward right now. I don't think it's fair for him to deny me what I want and lie about his reasoning."

"I never said I agreed with that, but you know how stubborn he can be. I don't know how to convince him to do anything else."

"Alice?"

"Hm?"

"Do you think what I have with Edward is really true love?"

"There are a lot of kinds of love, Bella."

"Do you think what I have with Edward is like what you have with Jasper?"

"What I have with Jasper is sort of unconventional."

"I thought you were soul mates like Carlisle and Esme or Emmett and Rosalie."

"We're definitely soul mates, but different people share different bonds. The love I feel with Jasper isn't as physically possessive as the love between Emmett and Rosalie. We belong together, but it's not ownership. We can be attracted to other people, and act on that attraction, without it being a betrayal of what we have together."

"You let him _cheat_ on you?"

"We don't see it that way. We have eternity to be together, and the understanding we share of one another runs unimaginably deep. You have a favorite food, right?"

"So?"

"If you were going to live forever, would you want to eat your favorite food _every_ time you got hungry?"

"I'd get sick of it!"

"Exactly. I love Jasper, but that doesn't mean I don't want to have other experiences, or that I want him to spend all of his time focused on me and me alone."

"Does your family know?"

"Sort of. They're more comfortable if we're discreet about it. Edward in particular finds our lifestyle… _objectionable _and would rather not think about it. Emmett likes to tease Rosalie about it, ask her if he can slip his granite sausage in other envelopes."

Her innuendo makes me giggle. "What does Rosalie do?"

"Oh, she gets _angry._ She gets a little violent with him sometimes, and drags him off. Judging by the stupid grin on his face when they get back, I think he likes what she does when she's pissed off."

I cringe. "I could've died happy without knowing that."

"You asked. I'm just being honest with you."

"Would you be honest with me if I asked you something kind of personal?"

"Yes, so don't ask unless you really want to know."

"Have you ever… When you do something with someone who isn't Jasper, has it ever been a girl?"

She giggles. "It's usually a girl. Other men have a lot to live up to, but being with a woman is a different experience entirely."

The butterflies in my stomach have spread out, and are now fluttering around in my brain, making coherent thought impossible.

"Bella? Are you okay?"

Weakly, I nod.

"Does it bother you? If you're not comfortable with me staying in the bed…"

"No! I mean, I'll get cold if you get up." I wiggle closer to her smooth, exquisite body.

"Have you ever had an experience with another woman, Bella?"

I blush scarlet. "I haven't, but I can't say it's not something I've wondered about…"

"It's adorable when you blush, you know."

I blush harder as she starts to stroke my hair. The feelings coursing through me are dizzying, almost more than I can handle, but I want this so badly I can only pray she doesn't stop. Finally I work up the nerve to roll over and face her.

"Alice, you're so beautiful." I breathe. She shudders, leaning closer to inhale my scent. The look on her face sends a rush of carnal desire through me. The glint in her eyes is distinctly predatory as she moves closer to me, her pace agonizingly slow. I imagine she's giving me a chance to move away if I don't want this, and I appreciate the gesture, but I can't stand waiting. My body closes the gap before my mind can harbor another thought.

The taste of her lips is incredible. They part eagerly when my tongue flicks across them. Kissing Alice makes my head swim and my heart race in ways that make my first kiss with Edward seem like a clumsy fumbling with Mike. She's utterly flawless, and my fingers tingle with the desire to explore every inch of her. Tentatively, I put my hand on her shoulder. A soft moan vibrates through the lips pressed against mine as I trace the curve of her spine. Her fingers are a little cooler now, but that's not why I shiver as she starts to explore my body. Nothing I have ever felt can compare to the wonderful, intoxicating sweetness of this moment.

Her hand grazes over my breast, and it's the first time anyone's touched me there, but my body arches into her, and everything that's happening right now feels so incredibly _right._ My hand slides up to explore her chest, something that has haunted my imagination since the day I laid eyes on her.

Her body is firm, solid, immortal, indestructible, but it has a softness Edward's never could accomplish. Edward felt like a moving statue. Alice doesn't feel human, but she feels more exquisite than anything I could have ever imagined. My breath hitches as she slides the strap down my shoulder, pushes aside the black silk covering my breast. My skin tingles everywhere it meets with hers. She nibbles on my earlobe, and, maddeningly gentle, kisses a trail down my neck. Her tongue flutters wildly against my shoulder and my head spins as her lips move lower.

Heat floods my body as her mouth grazes my collarbone, finally reaching my desperately waiting nipple.


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight!

* * *

The warmth and need growing between my legs are almost more than I can take.

"Bella, you smell _so good._" Alice murmurs, and somehow I know she isn't talking about my blood, that the thoughts racing through her mind right now have nothing to do with feeding. She pulls away, and I whine, wanting her close to me again, but she looks into my eyes.

"Bella," she asks, "are you sure you want to do this?"

I nod and my hungry lips lunge toward hers, but she pins me down and I writhe beneath the intensity of her gaze.

"I want you Bella. I've wanted you more than you can imagine since before the first time I even laid eyes on you. Weeks before you came to forks I started having visions of you, and even though at first I had no idea why I kept seeing you, I found you irresistible, even then. Sadly, I knew Edward wanted to be with you, and how could I take you from my brother who has never been in love?"

"Alice, I-"

"I know he doesn't make you happy the way he should. I don't need to read minds to see that. But Bella, he's still my brother. We can wait to tell him about us until you're ready, but I need you to know right now that there will come a time when either you have to tell him or what's between us has to stop. I can hide my thoughts for him for far longer than he would like to think, but I won't lie like that forever."

"What about Jasper?"

"If you decide you don't want to be with Edward, Jasper will help us. He will calm Edward down and do everything he can to comfort him. He knows that my capacity for love is not limited to him alone."

I'm stunned. I don't want to think this way, but I see visions of myself tied to Alice, and even dare to fantasize about her being the one to change me, even though I know that was just an empty threat she used to keep Edward from shutting me out. I take a deep breath.

"I don't think I want to be with him anymore. He doesn't even want to touch me."

"That," Alice says, sweet breath fanning over my face and neck, "is something I can't begin to comprehend."

She starts kissing me again, and my head is spinning so fast I feel like I might pass out. The taste of her mouth is entirely addictive and I mourn its loss when she moves away, even as her kisses fall on more sensitive areas. Shuddering, moaning, I've lost all coherent thought but I want her to keep going, to push me deeper into this chaotic, spinning, blissful universe. Her body has grown slightly cooler but still feels wonderful against mine, and now her tongue is tracing circles down my stomach, past my navel.

I cry out as she nuzzles between my legs, and I don't know what she's doing, but the room is spinning and my heart is racing. My hips buck forward and her tongue slides deeper, fluttering inside me in ways I never imagined a tongue could move.

"Alice," I moan, "don't stop, please don't stop!" But I don't think she could stop if she wanted to. She's devouring the wetness her touch has created with desperation that makes me feel better than I ever imagined was possible. The warmth and pleasure are building inside me and I feel like I'm going to explode, but somehow it grows even more intense. My eyes close and I cry out, riding waves of ecstasy until I'm reduced to a heap of tangled, sweating limbs on the soft, expensive bed.

"Mmm, Bella, you taste even better than you smell."

It takes a moment before I can even speak again, but there's something I'm dying to find out, so I have to ask Alice, "Can I try doing that to you?"

"Of course." Her tongue glides up my body. "God, Bella, even your sweat tastes incredible." I blush and her eyes fill with predatory fierceness. She shifts so that her pussy waits just above my face, and I don't even feel nervous anymore, I just plunge my tongue into her. She gasps as I moan against her flesh, amazed by how sweet and wonderful she tastes. I've never even imagined I'd be doing something like this, but I can tell by the way she writhes against my face that my mouth feels as good on her body as her body tastes in my mouth.

I'm not sure how I'm supposed to do this, but her incredible flavor pulls my mouth over every inch of firm, silky flesh I can reach, and my lips glide against her skin. Time blurs together so I don't know whether I've been licking her for seconds or hours when the most beautiful sound I've ever heard escapes her lips and I feel her body tense up against me.

And in this moment, I know, even if I live forever, nothing I could ever touch, or taste, or hear, could come close to being as wonderful as Alice quivering against my lips as her soft, melodic moans flow through my body.


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight!

* * *

I drift to sleep curled up against Alice, with my head resting on her chest. She wants to stay in bed with me, insists she could never be bored with my body this close to hers. I feel peaceful, wonderful, despite what looms ahead of me with Edward.

I shiver in the morning sun. Her body has grown cool during the night, but I can't bear to move away. Staring in awe at her sparkling pale skin, I wonder if last night was some painfully vivid dream.

"Good morning, Bella," she purrs into the warmth of my hair, "I hope you're not having second thoughts."

She has to know I'm not. "So we really…"

"Yes." Now she seems genuinely nervous. "You really did want to, didn't you?"

"More than I realized. Er, Alice?"

"Hmm?"

"Mind if I have a human moment?" Even though I can still taste her on my lips, I want to clean up a bit. I feel foggy and disheveled.

"Of course."

The shower feels incredible, and I let my mind wander to everything that's happened. What will Edward do when he finds out? I have this bizarre sense of obligation to him, like he owns me. After everything we've talked about, all the reasons he has insisted we can't be together, how will he react if I leave him only to fall into the arms of another vampire?

Everything with Edward has been about my mortality, about his condition, the fact that he thinks himself a monster. We've never talked much about whether we fit together in other ways, about what's between us once you take away the obvious. I can't help but hope that he's had doubts similar to mine, that our most striking differences were more of an excuse to him than anything else. Maybe he realized, even before I did, that we're just not right together, but he didn't have the words to tell me.

I don't want Alice to think I'm in here avoiding her, or that what's coming to be between us is the thing worrying me at all. I can't imagine how she could think I regret the most beautiful night of my life, but I know how preoccupied I must seem. It just seems wrong to bring up Edward with the person whose arms I really want to be in for the rest of my life, for eternity, for as long as she'll have me.

I decide to leave the towel in the bathroom after I dry off. I want Alice to know I'm confident about what's happening between us, that I don't want to hide from her anymore. I can't help but feel disappointed when she starts choosing an outfit for me with genuine enthusiasm.

"Alice…" I finally say, after she's adjusted my bra as though my breasts have no effect on her, "do you regret last night?"

She stops. "Of course not Bella. Is something bothering you?"

I blush. "Well, I just thought… I mean, that you might want to, you know…"

"Oh. _Oh!_ It's not that I don't want to." She looks nervous, like she would be blushing too now, if she could. "I promised Edward I'd have you back before he was." I catch a hint of distaste when she says his name. It's a beautiful thing to hear.

"Right."

"Bella, we're already running behind, and we still have one last stop to make before we leave town."

My eyes widen. "You mean we're still going to buy…" My cheeks are burning red.

"Of course, silly."

I can't help but feel a little disappointed. "I kind of thought since we… I was hoping I'd be able to do those things with you again."

She shakes her head, looking at me like I've just said something absurd. "First, if you want to be with me after you end things with Edward, I need some time to talk to Jasper and figure out how we're going to handle him. Second, even if I could have you all to myself right away, there are still plenty of things we can do together with your new toys."

She tries to get me to eat breakfast, but I insist I'm never hungry in the mornings anyway. Being the only one who has to eat still feels undeniably weird. They carry our things to the waiting car while we check out, and everything feels completely surreal.

The store we go to is nothing like I would have imagined. It's clean and bright, and the perky twenty-something woman who helps us makes me feel as comfortable as I can in such a situation. I'm still pretty pink while she and Alice gush about the new toys, and I almost jump out of my skin when she takes my hand and presses it to a vivid blue vibrator, buzzing at full speed.

"This one is designed with the g-spot in mind. It's definitely one of the best." It's attractive, with sleek lines, not seedy and weird like sex toys have always been in my imagination. Alice is nodding.

"G-spot?"

Alice looks aghast. "Please tell me you're joking."

I feel my cheeks getting redder. "So what if I'm not?"

Alice turns to the girl who's been helping us. "I think we'll need a few books while we're here." She nods and leads us to a shelf full of different titles, many bearing pictures that make me more than a little uncomfortable. Never in my life have I been surrounded by so much blatant sex. It makes my head spin, and not in a good way. Before I can object I'm holding a few books on female masturbation. My fingers tingle like they might be contaminated, but at the same time I'm dying to look inside. I remain silent, doing my best not to offend Alice. I know she'll leave me alone to decide how much, if anything, I want to read. She probably knows I won't be able to resist the lure of new books.

"Alice…" I say, suddenly a bit nervous, "what if Charlie finds this stuff?"

She pauses. "Good point. We'll need to get you a locking chest."

"Don't you think that'll seem kind of suspicious? I haven't had anything that needed to be kept secret before now."

"Just keep it in the back of your closet under a pile of clothes. It's not like Charlie's going to start doing your laundry. Besides," she says, pointing discreetly to her temple, "if it seems like Charlie might be looking around in your room soon, we can just move it all to my house."

I groan. "Exactly how much of this stuff are you planning on buying me?"

She giggles. "I had no idea you were so deprived. I think you'll need a rather large trunk."

_Great,_ I think, _if Charlie ever finds this stuff, he'll think I'm a deranged pervert._

Still, I can't help but feel a little excited by the sleek lines and pretty colors on all of the items surrounding us. I have to admit, I am a little curious…


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight!

* * *

We leave the store, carrying a locking chest that's probably big enough to hold everything I brought with me when I moved to Forks, not that I brought that much… But still, it's almost half full of books and batteries and toys I don't have a very good idea of how to use. Alice has assured me that, should I want to explore without her help, they all come with instructions. She has also assured me that there are more coming in the mail (addressed, thankfully, to her and not to me). It feels strange, knowing that I'll see Edward today. Yesterday's drive seems like the distant past, maybe because so much has changed since. I don't know how I'm going to face him.

"You're even more quiet than usual." Alice muses.

"I'm not sure what it'll be like with Edward now that… well, after last night."

"I know how to keep my thoughts to myself well enough that he won't know anything."

"But _I do,_ Alice. I don't think I want to be with him anymore now that I know how these things are supposed to feel."

She sighs. "I know, Bella, but I need to talk to Jasper about this. Edward hasn't ever latched on to someone the way he's latched onto you, and I'm not sure how he'll handle finding out that this may not be what you want after all. Also, I don't want you to rush into anything. I want you to take some time to really think about what _you _want, not how other people are going to feel about the choices you make."

"How _do_ you feel about last night?"

"What happened was… well, I definitely enjoyed it, but if it wasn't right for you, we can pretend it never happened, and hopefully at least still be friends."

"I think I want more than just to be your friend, Alice."

She smiles, but doesn't say anything. My thoughts whirl together, and the drive home is over before I know it. Alice helps me carry my new things inside, carefully hiding the trunk full of adult toys under a pyramid of bags stuffed with clothes. Charlie hardly looks up from the TV, and for once, I'm grateful for that. If he saw how much we were carrying in, he would probably get a bit suspicious. Once it's all put away in my room, he'll probably never notice that I now have about twice as much stuff as I used to.

After we've finished unloading, Alice plants a quick kiss on my cheek and rushes out the door, leaving me tracing fingertips across the skin that tingles where we touched. I try to lose myself in making dinner. Charlie comments that I should eat more, but if he notices the blush that's been burning in my cheeks since Alice's lips casually grazed my skin, he doesn't mention it. Now, more than ever, I'm glad he doesn't pay obsessively close attention to me. I wonder if he would ever suspect what came to pass…

I guess it doesn't matter, since he doesn't know what's going through my head. I wash the dishes slowly, and don't let him help. I know Edward will be waiting for me once I've finished, so I'm not in much of a hurry to get upstairs. I try to move quickly enough for the length of my absence not to make him suspicious. I dry the last dish and put it away, then say goodnight to Charlie and head upstairs. He's used to me going up early now. I tell him I like to finish my homework before bed, that it helps me relax.

My stomach drops when I push the door to my room open and see Edward, wearing a cocky grin as he picks through the sheer nightgowns Alice got me.

"Going to wear one of these tonight?" He teases.

"That depends. Are you going to show me you appreciate it?"

"Bella," he says in a pained voice, "you know I can't take that kind of risk with you. Even to kiss you is more than I should allow myself."

I roll my eyes, grabbing some of my old flannel pajamas and heading for the bathroom.

"Don't be that way. It'll break Alice's heart if you don't wear the lovely things she got you."

"I'm sick of being untouchable." I mutter as I leave the room, knowing he'll hear me. I hear a pained sigh before I'm able to close the door.

I spend longer in the shower than is strictly necessary, but I need some time to think. I don't know what to tell him, or whether he'll even notice a difference now that I'm aware of the way his touch _should _effect me. For once, I'm glad he isn't interested in touching me much more than he would touch a good friend.

He smiles when I return, lifting up the covers and waiting for me to crawl into bed with him. I don't have the energy to make excuses tonight, so I curl up next to him, our bodies separated, as they always are, by the fluffy barrier my comforter forms. Why doesn't he want to make himself warm like Alice did, I wonder.

"Did you girls have fun?" His voice in my ear still raises the hairs on the back of my neck, but the feeling is different now. I shrug.

"Alice bought me more clothes than I could ever need."

"Do you love her, Bella?"

Adrenaline rushes though me, and I hope for once, he somehow doesn't notice.

"What?" I try to keep the fear I feel from manifesting in my voice.

"She's your best friend, right?"

"Oh. Yes, of course."

"Then just placate her. I can't remember the last time she got this excited over a human."

I know the feelings flooding me now have to be wrong, but the bliss is too tempting to fight.

"Don't worry. I'll wear the clothes if it'll make her happy." He shifts closer, obviously happy with my concession.

"Oh, and Bella?" he asks, right when I'm on the verge of sleep.

"What?" I try not to sound annoyed.

"What's in the locked trunk?"

I'm sure he can feel the heat of my blush, but I don't answer, instead breathing slowly, carefully, trying to pretend I've fallen asleep.


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight!

* * *

I spend most of Sunday cleaning. I desperately want to go to the Cullens', to see Alice, but I'd rather not make Charlie suspicious. Edward helps, and I don't admit to him that I'd much rather spend some time alone. I _definitely_ don't want to make him suspicious, either.

He can still tell my mind is somewhere else. I can't stop thinking about Alice's cool, smooth fingers brushing across me in the changing rooms, Alice with shiny wet black hair falling around her face in the bathtub, Alice in bed next to me, Alice's body moving closer to mine…

"Bella?" Edward looks worried. "Are you okay?"

"Hmm? Oh, yeah, fine. I just remembered some math homework I forgot to take care of." I'm a terrible liar, but he doesn't question me, instead simply offering to help.

When night finally comes, it take me hours to fall asleep. My mind wanders wildly, projecting infinite futures in which I end up spending my life, or longer, with Alice. I feel a strange thrill at the thought of her venom coursing through my veins and stopping my heart. I want to be beautiful like she is. I want the connection between us to be unbreakable. Finally, I fall into a fitful sleep, praying Edward won't hear me talking about her.

Morning comes much too fast. I'm looking forward to school, because I'm dying to see her again, dying for her to give me some sort of sign that what happened between us was more than just a dream. After breakfast with Charlie (and more of his complaints about my eating habits) I take a long, hot shower. Now that I've started acknowledging my attraction to Alice, I can't stop thinking about her. I'm almost tempted to look inside the trunk whose key is hidden the one place Edward and Charlie will never look- in my box of tampons.

Of course, I don't want to be late, so I ignore the aching need I feel and get dressed in some of my new clothes. Alice greets me the same way she does every morning- she throws her arms around me and I try not to lose myself in the sensation of her flawlessly graceful touch. I wonder if it's just my imagination when her fingertips seem to linger on my body for just an instant more than they normally do.

I struggle to pay attention in class, and Edward keeps shooting me these long, worried glances. I don't think he suspects anything is going on with Alice yet, but I can't help but worry. Does he notices the way my heart pounds when she touches me? It occurs to me that my body has probably done that all along, and he hasn't noticed anymore than I used to. It's amazing how much can change in a single night.

Finally, it's time for Spanish. I'm not extraordinarily fond of foreign languages, but it's the only class I have with Alice that none of the other Cullens take. She sits next to me, closer than usual, because this is the only time no one will notice. It's not exactly hot outside, but she's wearing shorts today, and I can feel the exquisite curves of her leg as it brushes against mine under the table. We pass notes, confident that her abilities can protect us from detection.

_This weekend was weird. _I write, passing the paper to her. I steal a glance at her, noticing the tiny frown that crosses her delicate features as she writes her response before sliding the paper back across the desk.

_**Did I do something wrong?**_

_Not with you, with Edward…_

_**How so?**_

_It feels strange being with him now, like everything that happens between us is a lie._

She sighs. _**I'm sorry, Bella. I didn't mean to make things harder for you, even though I guess on some level, I knew I would.**_

_I'd rather have a problem being with Edward than spend my life thinking there's something wrong with me. I wouldn't take back what happened on Friday for anything. _

_**Try to look sick.**_

_What?_

_**Start acting like you don't feel well. In about five minutes, get up and leave the room. Try to look unsteady on your feet, like you feel light-headed. **_

_Why?_

_**I'll be sent to check on you after a few minutes. Just wait for me in the hall. If you miss anything, I certainly wouldn't mind tutoring you.**_

I glance over at Alice. She's staring straight ahead, looking very convincingly attentive, but I can see the grin fighting to break out in the dimples that have appeared in her cheeks, and the way the corners of her mouth twitch upward, just a tiny bit. I slump over in my chair and think about everything that bothers me, about Edward and Charlie and whether what's happening with Alice will last, about whether she'll want to be with me forever, or if this is just a fling to her. Then I think about the way she touched me, about the strange softness of her body, the way she devoured me with kisses, the look of utter bliss on her face while it all happened… and I can feel my face growing red.

_**Good. Now walk out of the room and wait for me on the bench just outside the door. We should be able to get a minute alone. Be patient, I won't come out right away.**_

I push back from my chair, watching the sheet of paper that was on the table in front of me vanish into her pocket, and walk quickly out of the room, not walking in a perfectly straight line, but careful not to knock anything over. It's not that hard. I actually do feel a bit light-headed from not being able to eat much at breakfast. It's a good thing lunch comes after this class.

I sit on the bench in the hall, and try not to think too much about why she might have wanted me out here, or the millions of other questions swirling through my head. I've almost forgotten why I'm waiting by the time the door opens, and my eyes meet hers. I stand, and she crosses the hallway at an unnatural speed, not willing to waste an instant of the time we have. She leans close, and I inhale her scent, savoring the unbelievable sweetness. My eyes drift shut as her lips meet mine, making them tingle, barely touching. I press forward and deepen the kiss. My body is flooded with sensations as her cool fingers slip into my hair and her lips part instantly. It's barely been two days, and already I've forgotten how unbelievably good she tastes. We explore each other's mouths, drinking in the flavors and sensations. My hands slide over her body, and she pulls away, much too soon.

"Bella," she gasps, and I imagine that if her heart were still alive, it would be racing like mine is now, "we have to go back to class before they miss us." I realize suddenly that I'm not sure how much time has passed while we were kissing, but assume the deep flush that has crept over my body is a good indication that it's been a few minutes.

I sigh, and her arm slides across my shoulders before she leads me back into the room. She passes the teacher a slip of paper, which she must have written on before we left the room. I glance down at her delicate handwriting.

_**Girl problems. **_

I'm glad the teacher is a man. He doesn't question us, and his ears grow distinctly red as we take our seats.


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight!

The instant I find her in the hall, Alice's lips press against my own. I moan softly, enjoying her taste, fascinated with the feel of her body. I know she couldn't have planned this- that would have been too dangerous. It's difficult enough for her to keep Edward from sensing the way she feels about me. Making plans for when we can be together again is simply out of the question right now.

Unbelievably, this is far better than I remember. Her cool skin against mine doesn't make me shiver the way Edward's would; the fire Alice has ignited deep inside me is burning much too hot for any sort of chills to creep into my body.

I can feel the flush exploding over my pale skin as Alice's marble fingers wrap around my wrist and she pulls me into a broom closet, of all places. I don't care about romance and the perfect situation anymore. All I want is to feel her, taste her, smell her.

Alice is pinning me against the wall, kissing me everywhere, holding me with strong arms and whispering such beautiful things I feel like my heart could break right here, right now, in a broom closet in some high school in the middle of nowhere.

An arm around my waist holds me up, holds me close, as the fingers of her other hand join her mouth in a detailed exploration of every part of me. I gasp as she unbuttons my jeans, sliding a cool, silky hand inside of my panties, and her eyes catch mine.

I wonder now how I ever thought Edward beautiful. The air between us tingles with anticipation as I stare into her flawless eyes, eyes so clear and deep I'm almost drowning in them, even as I feel more alive than I've ever felt before.

I wonder if something's wrong with me. What kind of girl could fall in love with her boyfriend's sister? It's hard to feel wrong with my heart racing like it is and my hands moving like this is the most right, natural thing I could ever do.

Soon, I lose track of my own thoughts and insecurities, as her smell fills my lungs and her taste lingers on my lips. This kind of heaven is worth any hell I might have coming to me. I don't care anymore.

I kiss my way down her neck, fluttering my tongue over her chest, marveling at the sweetness of her skin and the unbearably breathtaking pink of her perky, freshly exposed nipples. It's almost more than I can take, and my head is spinning now, but it's too wonderful to ignore, so I lean closer and let myself get lost.

I remember a time when I wanted children, a time when "normal" was enough, but none of that is left in me anymore. All I want is to be hers, to give every tiny part of me to Alice in exchange for the sound of her voice, the feel of her touch, the taste of her lips.

And if this makes me a bad person, I'm in too deep to care. I kiss a trail down her stomach, somehow soft and chiseled at the same time, like a statue that breathes warmth and feeling, something far too beautiful to not see as alive, maybe even more alive than I am.

The sensations washing over me now blind me to everything I ever imagined about pleasure, about happiness. I wonder if I'll ever be able to breathe comfortably again when her scent doesn't linger in the air, and I know it's wrong to doubt such a thing, but I don't want to live without her.

"Alice" I breathe, in a voice I never thought she could her.

"Bella."

"Alice, I think I love you."

"Don't be afraid. I love you too."

"But isn't it wrong?" She's drawing me up now, pulling me close, and I marvel at her gentle touch, because I know her strength.

"What's wrong with love?"

"I'm supposed to love Edward."

"'Supposed to' only exists in fairy tales. Trust me, Bella, it can't make you happy in the real world."

"But what about Edward? What about Jasper?"

"Jasper knows my love for you doesn't change my love for him, and Edward needs to find his own happiness."

"How can you feel so sure?"

She smirks at me now. "Trust me. I am."

I roll my eyes, wondering whether she's just saying these things to make me feel safe, but maybe it doesn't matter, because I _do_ feel safe. Am I sick for not being able to feel this way with Edward?

Her lips are silk against my neck, her kisses landing like tiny butterflies on my skin, so soft I can barely feel them, but too lovely to ignore. The movements of my clumsy human fingers seem devastatingly haphazard and random as they travel over her perfect body, but she's inhaling, drawing closer, and I know now that even my flaws are something she wants to savor.

"Bella, you taste so sweet." Alice murmurs in my ear, voice barely above a whisper, but smoldering with need. I can't imagine that I, or anything else for that matter, could possibly taste as sweet as her cool flesh against my tongue, but the words I'm groping for are nowhere to be found, so I bury my face in her short, dark hair and let myself get lost in her exploration of my body.

Her fingers are sliding down my stomach again, and I feel a twinge of guilt, praying her ability to see things coming still works when she's distracted, terrified of what could happen if someone finds us here together. Still, I can't resist Alice, and she knows that. I arch into her touch, biting down on her cool shoulder as I stifle a soft moan, and my body is responding in ways I didn't think it could. I wish I could forget Edward, just for now, for long enough to enjoy this pleasure without the tiny hint of bitterness left by the guilt I feel for not being able to be this way with him.

The orgasm crashes over me, making my legs shake. Alice lets out a soft, possessive purr as my teeth clench against her granite skin and my body trembles against hers. She kisses my lips gently, and then she's pulling my clothes back into place. She smiles at the puzzled look on my face.

"Class is about to let out."

She takes my hand and draws me gently out of the closet. The bell rings just as the door closes behind us, and I follow her back to the classroom, content in knowing that she'll say just the right thing to charm us out of any trouble.


	12. Chapter 12

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight!

My feet feel light and disconnected as I plant one in front of the other and Edward walks beside me. We're headed for Chemistry, and I pray we don't have a lab today because my head is floating somewhere in the clouds and all I can think about is Alice.

"Bella?"

"Hmm?"

"Are you alright?"

I bite my lip, knowing I have to lie but also very aware of how easily he can see the way I'm blushing. "Yeah… Just…"

"What is it?"

"I'm worried about Renee." I finish lamely, "She seems even more out of it than usual lately, but she swears nothing's wrong, and even if that's true, I'm afraid she'll hurt herself not paying attention to what's going on around her."

He draws me close, and I feel relieved but a tiny bit ashamed as I wonder when I learned to lie convincingly. "She'll be fine, Bella. She's an adult and she can take care of herself."

"I don't know if I'd go that far…"

Edward kisses my forehead, and my stomach flips with guilt. "You worry too much."

I shrug. "Maybe you're right."

Class drags on forever, and unease blossoms inside me when Edward leads me into the woods instead of taking me home after school. He has a mystical, ethereal look in the spotted green light that dances between the shadows stretched over his skin like lace. I can't help but think of Alice, even now, but I try to focus on Edward.

"So why the random detour?" I ask, trying to keep my voice calm and nonchalant.

"I think you know what this is about, Bella." His face is unreadable as he turns to me and takes my hands in his, and for a moment my heart stops. "Prom is coming up. I know how you feel about these things, but I'd really like it if you come with me."

I try to hide my relief, nodding and letting him take me in his arms, unaware of the weight resting on my shoulders, the words waiting to push through my lips. I want to get away so I can call Alice, but Edward is always close, always with me. I wish he needed to hunt tonight, just so I could be alone and have a chance to talk to her. I don't know if I can do this anymore.

I toss and turn all night. I can see Edward's face in the moonlight falling through my window, and he looks concerned. I try to pretend I'm asleep, but he probably knows I'm faking it. I'm glad Charlie is gone when I wake up, because my stomach is so knotted, there's no way I could eat breakfast. From the moment I get to school, Alice shoots me searching looks whenever Edward is distracted, and somehow it bothers me that she can tell something is wrong when he can't. My classes take forever, because for most of the day I'm next to Edward, and I know he's watching me. Third hour, I feel so overwhelmed I take a trip to the bathroom that I don't necessarily need, and somehow Alice is there already, waiting for me. Even though my eyes sting with unshed tears, I don't realize how much I want to cry until she pulls me into her arms and my breath is coming so fast and hard my head spins and I sag against her.

"Oh, Bella…" she murmurs into my hair, and I feel so lost right now.

"Alice?" she holds me closer. Maybe she can hear the raw need in my voice.

"Yes?"

"Are you sure this isn't wrong?"

"Edward asked you to prom yesterday."

"Yes."

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you. A lot of the time I can see the future, but I didn't think to wonder whether that would upset you. I didn't think it would the way it did."

"Alice, does he love me?"

She sighs. "In his way, yes, he loves you Bella. But he doesn't love you in the way you wanted to love him, and maybe that's why you can't feel that way about him."

I look at her, feeling more than a little puzzled. "How do you know?"

She rolls her eyes. "Jasper."

It bothers me a little that he knows, and that he probably knew before I did that what I have with Edward can't be the everlasting romantic love we both envisioned. Still, Alice knows how I feel, and she's here to comfort me, and that means more than anything else that's going on. I'm not even sure I could survive this realization without her by my side, holding me and promising things will eventually be ok.

"I don't want to go to prom with him, Alice." I'm on the verge of sobbing again, but I fight it. I know she loves me, but I don't want her to see me as completely weak.

"Bella," she says softly, "it's okay. You can go to prom with Edward if you want to, and if you don't, you can back out any time. I promise you he wouldn't ask someone else."

"Is that supposed to make me feel better?"

"Either way, you know it's true. It will hurt his pride, but you're not his one and only love. Honestly, I don't think he's ready to love someone that way. Men mature more slowly than women, and he was just on the cusp of emotional maturity when his life started to slip away and Carlisle decided to turn him. I think some day, he might be ready, but now, he only seems like he is at first."

"I want to believe you, but wouldn't you lie to take away my pain?"

She kisses away the teardrops on my face before replying. "Bella, I would do anything to make you feel safe and whole, but I think in the end, lying to you would only hurt you more, so I would never do that."

I press closer to Alice, and even though I know I should keep my distance, her scent does something to me and my body presses closer until her back is against the cold tiled wall and my tongue is dancing against hers, her taste making every nerve in my body tingle with anticipation.

"Bella…?"

I turn, and the blood in my veins turns to ice as I see Jessica standing in the doorway with wide eyes and flushed cheeks.


End file.
